How to Ruin Your Life

February 18th, 2021
by Andrew VanCott

One of the repeated sayings you’ll hear in our house is “we don’t do secrets, we only do surprises.”

Out of the many reasons we champion this value is my belief that usually, nothing good is done in secret (except your good deeds that are between you and God). Another way to think about keeping things a secret is keeping them in the dark. In John 3:19, we see the apostle John categorizing people in general as loving “darkness instead of light because their deeds were evil.”

There is something about the cover of darkness that can make us feel safe. Perhaps you’ve believed the lie that if you sin in private and no one finds out about it, then it’s not a big deal. Eventually, you may have to lie or deceive others to keep it hidden but you feel OK because you haven’t been outed. You might even justify your sin by saying it’s private and not affecting anyone else. All of this wrong thinking will lead to one outcome: DESTRUCTION.

If you want a surefire way to ruin your life, keep all of your sin hidden and never confess it. You may be thinking the opposite is true; that if you confess your sin, life as you know it will be over. When you sin, there will be consequences whether you confess your sin or keep it a secret. Keeping your sin secret delays the consequences and the longer you delay the consequences, the worse they will get.

If you want to avoid ruining your life, marriage, family, career, reputation, and friendships, here’s what you need to do:

1. Believe nothing is really a secret.

Your sin is not a secret from God. You may be able to hide it from your family, friends and your boss but not from the one who knows all and sees all. Hebrews 4:13 says, “Nothing in all creation is hidden from God’s sight. Everything is uncovered and laid bare before the eyes of him to whom we must give account.” The one who we are accountable knows everything. Followers of Jesus don’t have to be afraid of this truth because although God sees your sin, he still loves you. He loves you enough to bring conviction to you in the midst of it. Those times when you feel convicted may be God trying to get your attention.

2. Confess your sins to another person.

The best first step is confessing your sins to God and asking for his forgiveness. He also calls us to confess to other people as well. This is the hardest step, but a crucial one. James 5:16 says, “Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed.”

When you confess the sin to another person, you bring it into the light. I’ve found that a sin that I was unable to shake by simply confessing it to God loses some power over me when I bring it out into the open with others. There is freedom in confession. The truth does set us free! (John 8:32)

You won’t do these two things unless you have the right motivation. Being fearful that continuing to sin will ruin your life may help at first. After a while, the fear will dwindle and you will move back into the dark.

Only a love for Jesus will help you stay on the road towards life. When you understand that you are loved unconditionally no matter what you’ve done, your motivation can change to live a life that will honor Christ. Ask him to help you believe the truth and confess as you try to live for him.